Abnormal Symptoms

I was going to post about the weekend..the usual steroid melt-downs, a failed attempt at a family day out (silly me--it's steroid week), and the fact Jacks baseball game was rained out...well cancelled after we waited two hours in the rain!

However, tonight is not following the usual madness we have got so used to.  Tonight Sammy went limp, felt 'strange', and found it hard to walk.  Terror strikes when the usual pain, feelings of every inch on one's body is crawling, and 'screamers' turn into something else.  This was not usual, we don't like things deviating from our comfort zone.

A call to CHAM left us knowing very little.  The doctor on call said she didn't know what could be causing it, it wasn't the increased meds, and we should just wait until morning.  Mummy radar is at full throttle and I am researching all I can about this.  Nada!

So, we will watch and wait...literally.  I'm signing off to go and sit with my little warrior as he tries to get to sleep.  I will stay with him all night if he continues to feel strange.  I don't know how these children do it.  Sammy is putting up with things most adults would never stop complaining about.  All he says is, I wish it would go away.  So do I, my love, so do I!

Questions From a Six Year Old

This afternoon, driving home after Sammy's PT, he asked me a question that astounded me.  He asked,

"Will I ever be able to run fast like I used to?"

I wanted to stop the car and hug my little man, soothe his fears, and promise a total comeback from the debilitating effects of the chemo.  That was not possible.

What I could do, however, was calmly tell Sammy that he should get back to being fast once he finishes chemo.

"But are you sure?" he asked.

"Well, your doctors are some of the best, and they say you should get back to the way you were before..."

"Yes, but will I really?"

My superhero was showing me just how aware he was of the way I answered the questions.  He wanted to hear an outright guarantee, and that was something I could not do.

No one knows if he will totally lose the weak legs and limp.   He may never have full use of his hands...therefore, I cannot confirm that this will definitely happen.

All I could do was reiterate how sure the doctors were that he should get better, and remind Sammy that we expect the best results once he has stopped treatment.

We then went on to discuss the magnitude of the party we will be having once treatment is over.  Expect a BIG bash....and Sammy wants to stay up until midnight.  THAT I can guarantee he'll do!